*GUESS YOU COULD SAY I GAVE YOU MY EDGE*-interpol
I know all the cool kids are at South by Southwest this week. I know I'm missing killer performances. My favorite fucking bands like the Killers, Franz Ferdinand, the New Year and Modest Mouse are playing this year! Also playing are some folks I'd love to get to see play live: people like Joan Jett (who I was too lazy to go see when she played at Warsaw during CMJ), the Von Bondies, Neal Pollack (whose book/record combo I freakin' love!), Atmosphere, the Walkmen, the Thrills and N.E.R.D.!! Plus, Wayne Coyne is giving what I'm sure is a very smart, yet weird, talk. (Don't worry the has-beens are also representing! Washed up actresses like Tia Carrera and Julie Delpy are playing the roles of chanteuses at this year's fest! If anyone caught their show I want a full report! Were they expectedly terrible? Did Tia perform "Ballroom Blitz"? Were they surprisingly good? Is the chick from "Before Sunrise" the future of girly singer/songwriters??)
Anyhoo.... I'm sure there are loads of people on the Internet who can give you a full report on the festival's goings-on. I am not one of them. I spent this weekend, relatively quietly- wishing my back wasn't in so much pain, that I wasn't so doped up, that I had the money to make the trip to Austin, that I worked for a publication that wanted to send me there..... Whatever. I can offer you this: my week in review!
WINNERS:
Canada. That's right folks, my home country is a real winner this week. In a step that would make them only the second country (after the Netherlands) to do so, Canada is planning on selling medical grade marijuana in pharmacies. As if I needed another reason to move back to the motherland! Our home and native land- INDEED!
Prince. He was inducted in the Rock and Rolll Hall of Fame this week. His performances (of "Let's Go Crazy"/"Kiss" and his bitchin' guitar solo on the George Harrison tribute of "While My Guitar Gently Weeps") were the highlight of an otherwise pretty boring induction ceremony. Though he may have found Jehovah, or whatever, he is still the most rocking Sexy Motherfucker around. Did you see his asymentrically hemmed suit jacket? Did you catch his hanging-off-the-stage backbend during WMGGW? Tickets for his new show go on sale at noon today and God knows I'll be first in line for tickets. (Or should I say, I've put Beth in charge of being first in line for tickets. Did I mention how I'm trying to talk her into wearing her Prince Halloween costume to the show?!) Prince at Madison Square Garden? I'm there. That's fucking once in a lifetime. (I hear he's renounced his "perverted songs" but I'm still hoping to hear some "Little Red Corvette" and "Darling Nikki.")
"Dawn of the Dead." While I don't actually plan on seeing this zombie remake, I'm pro anything that knocks Mel and his "Passion" out of the top box office spot. Plus, Sarah Polley is in it.
Ella "Crazy Eye" VanAwesome. Cuz I promised her mommies that I'd mention her here. Plus, she is the world's best dog. (Before the back mishap, I was her designated dog walker. If she could just learn how to approach the cute guys with dogs, she'd be PERFECT!) If I knew how to post pictures on blogger, I'd let you see her for herself. (If anyone knows how to do this, email me!!)
LOSERS:
Courtney Love. It's not even fun to watch the trainwreck anymore. I had to watch her Letterman appearance through my fingers, like it was a goddamn horror film. What happened to the fucked up, but strong, rocking, feminist Courtney of the ninties? She was off-the-wall and kinderwhore-y and clearly on drugs. But the music was good and in her public appearances she seemed really smart and savvy. Like the ambitious grrrl I wanted for an older, rockstar sister. Then she went all glam and Hollywood. She seemed cleaned up and her bad skin and bad nose and awesomely bad fashions went the way of her husband. Fans yelled sellout, but I was still behind her. I applauded her acting in "Larry Flynt," I thought her relationship with Ivy Leaguer, Edward Norton, was charming. But now? I don't even know what to make of her. Everywhere she goes, she gets arrested. She is stripping and screaming on Letterman. She's hitting people with mike stands and awaiting hearing dates (that she shows up for late and CLEARLY high). I'm not the poster child for clean living, but she is fucked up beyond recognition. Courtney, where is your daughter? Clean up. Get a band that doesn't look like they were LA model/actresses who dropped out of AA with you. Put out a decent album. AND STAY HOME SOMETIMES!
Paris and Britney. It seems like both publicity-shy blond geniuses are both injured. (Brit hurt her knee, cancelling concerts and Paris fell off a horse filming the Simple Life 2.) Way to go girls. With your bodies not in working condition, maybe now people can respect you for your minds. By the way, I'm taking bets on whether or not a hurt knee is the new publicist-speak for rehab. Is it the new "hospitalized for exhaustion"?
Whitney Houston. It's been a big week in crazy diva news. She's apparantly checked herself into rehab. (I guess the real losers this week are Bobbi Christina and Francis Bean!) Did I mention that she checked herself in while Bobby Brown is still serving jail time? I guess crack really is whack! I should mention that Beth and I (in our yearlong search for a costume!) are considering being Courtney and Whitney for Halloween 2004. It's a crazy bitch Halloween!
Crucifiction. A delusional dude in Maine tried to crucify himself to death. Thanks, Mel Gibson!
Saint Patrick's Day. Did anyone notice that it happened this year? I sure as shit didn't.
The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame induction ceremony. I mean I like "Night Moves" as much as the next person but- outside of George Harrison and Prince- I just didn't give a damn about the bands this year. Although it would be hard to top last year's ceremony for me- I mean, the Clash, Elvis Costello, AC/DC! They are some of my favorite bands of all time. Hell, even though I can't stomach the new age-y, stale, middle-aged Sting, I still think the Police are a more vital choice than ZZ Top. But that's just me. Plus, I couldn't even concentrate on the thank-you speeches this year because the producers made the terrible and confusing choice of giving us a split screen of the artist's performance and their speeches.
That's all folks. Spazz on, spazz!
I know all the cool kids are at South by Southwest this week. I know I'm missing killer performances. My favorite fucking bands like the Killers, Franz Ferdinand, the New Year and Modest Mouse are playing this year! Also playing are some folks I'd love to get to see play live: people like Joan Jett (who I was too lazy to go see when she played at Warsaw during CMJ), the Von Bondies, Neal Pollack (whose book/record combo I freakin' love!), Atmosphere, the Walkmen, the Thrills and N.E.R.D.!! Plus, Wayne Coyne is giving what I'm sure is a very smart, yet weird, talk. (Don't worry the has-beens are also representing! Washed up actresses like Tia Carrera and Julie Delpy are playing the roles of chanteuses at this year's fest! If anyone caught their show I want a full report! Were they expectedly terrible? Did Tia perform "Ballroom Blitz"? Were they surprisingly good? Is the chick from "Before Sunrise" the future of girly singer/songwriters??)
Anyhoo.... I'm sure there are loads of people on the Internet who can give you a full report on the festival's goings-on. I am not one of them. I spent this weekend, relatively quietly- wishing my back wasn't in so much pain, that I wasn't so doped up, that I had the money to make the trip to Austin, that I worked for a publication that wanted to send me there..... Whatever. I can offer you this: my week in review!
WINNERS:
Canada. That's right folks, my home country is a real winner this week. In a step that would make them only the second country (after the Netherlands) to do so, Canada is planning on selling medical grade marijuana in pharmacies. As if I needed another reason to move back to the motherland! Our home and native land- INDEED!
Prince. He was inducted in the Rock and Rolll Hall of Fame this week. His performances (of "Let's Go Crazy"/"Kiss" and his bitchin' guitar solo on the George Harrison tribute of "While My Guitar Gently Weeps") were the highlight of an otherwise pretty boring induction ceremony. Though he may have found Jehovah, or whatever, he is still the most rocking Sexy Motherfucker around. Did you see his asymentrically hemmed suit jacket? Did you catch his hanging-off-the-stage backbend during WMGGW? Tickets for his new show go on sale at noon today and God knows I'll be first in line for tickets. (Or should I say, I've put Beth in charge of being first in line for tickets. Did I mention how I'm trying to talk her into wearing her Prince Halloween costume to the show?!) Prince at Madison Square Garden? I'm there. That's fucking once in a lifetime. (I hear he's renounced his "perverted songs" but I'm still hoping to hear some "Little Red Corvette" and "Darling Nikki.")
"Dawn of the Dead." While I don't actually plan on seeing this zombie remake, I'm pro anything that knocks Mel and his "Passion" out of the top box office spot. Plus, Sarah Polley is in it.
Ella "Crazy Eye" VanAwesome. Cuz I promised her mommies that I'd mention her here. Plus, she is the world's best dog. (Before the back mishap, I was her designated dog walker. If she could just learn how to approach the cute guys with dogs, she'd be PERFECT!) If I knew how to post pictures on blogger, I'd let you see her for herself. (If anyone knows how to do this, email me!!)
LOSERS:
Courtney Love. It's not even fun to watch the trainwreck anymore. I had to watch her Letterman appearance through my fingers, like it was a goddamn horror film. What happened to the fucked up, but strong, rocking, feminist Courtney of the ninties? She was off-the-wall and kinderwhore-y and clearly on drugs. But the music was good and in her public appearances she seemed really smart and savvy. Like the ambitious grrrl I wanted for an older, rockstar sister. Then she went all glam and Hollywood. She seemed cleaned up and her bad skin and bad nose and awesomely bad fashions went the way of her husband. Fans yelled sellout, but I was still behind her. I applauded her acting in "Larry Flynt," I thought her relationship with Ivy Leaguer, Edward Norton, was charming. But now? I don't even know what to make of her. Everywhere she goes, she gets arrested. She is stripping and screaming on Letterman. She's hitting people with mike stands and awaiting hearing dates (that she shows up for late and CLEARLY high). I'm not the poster child for clean living, but she is fucked up beyond recognition. Courtney, where is your daughter? Clean up. Get a band that doesn't look like they were LA model/actresses who dropped out of AA with you. Put out a decent album. AND STAY HOME SOMETIMES!
Paris and Britney. It seems like both publicity-shy blond geniuses are both injured. (Brit hurt her knee, cancelling concerts and Paris fell off a horse filming the Simple Life 2.) Way to go girls. With your bodies not in working condition, maybe now people can respect you for your minds. By the way, I'm taking bets on whether or not a hurt knee is the new publicist-speak for rehab. Is it the new "hospitalized for exhaustion"?
Whitney Houston. It's been a big week in crazy diva news. She's apparantly checked herself into rehab. (I guess the real losers this week are Bobbi Christina and Francis Bean!) Did I mention that she checked herself in while Bobby Brown is still serving jail time? I guess crack really is whack! I should mention that Beth and I (in our yearlong search for a costume!) are considering being Courtney and Whitney for Halloween 2004. It's a crazy bitch Halloween!
Crucifiction. A delusional dude in Maine tried to crucify himself to death. Thanks, Mel Gibson!
Saint Patrick's Day. Did anyone notice that it happened this year? I sure as shit didn't.
The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame induction ceremony. I mean I like "Night Moves" as much as the next person but- outside of George Harrison and Prince- I just didn't give a damn about the bands this year. Although it would be hard to top last year's ceremony for me- I mean, the Clash, Elvis Costello, AC/DC! They are some of my favorite bands of all time. Hell, even though I can't stomach the new age-y, stale, middle-aged Sting, I still think the Police are a more vital choice than ZZ Top. But that's just me. Plus, I couldn't even concentrate on the thank-you speeches this year because the producers made the terrible and confusing choice of giving us a split screen of the artist's performance and their speeches.
That's all folks. Spazz on, spazz!
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