Monday, November 08, 2004

There are many things that I would like to say to you..

I apologize for my prolonged absence. Thursday night in my fucked up stupor I wrote a huge, long entry lamenting the election, talking about Halloween, plotting my return to Canada (land of the sane), and wishing (the artist formerly known as my boyfriend) Ryan Adams a happy birthday. And then, as I tried to post the entry, my Internet connection went dead (it still hasn’t been restored so I’m sorry to those of you who emailed me over the weekend to no response) and my computer froze and when I rebooted all of my witty banter had, alas!, disappeared. I will do my best to recapitulate the salient points, but frankly my heart just isn’t in it anymore.
So…regarding the election, all I can do is quote the British Daily Mirror’s headline, “How can 59,054,087 people be so dumb?” I’ve really been almost too upset to even talk about it or watch the news. I am disgusted with the American people and moving back to Toronto seems like a wise idea. Hell, my life wouldn’t be that different there. I could still write music reviews, I could still live in an apartment much like the one I currently occupy in Williamsburg, I could still go see movies at little independent theaters, and most major concert tours would still come to the town I live in (hell, I bet I could see controller.controller all the time, living in their hometown!). I could do all of that AND still get an abortion, go to a gay friend’s wedding, and smoke pot kinda legally.Plus I could sleep soundly knowing that my country isn’t involved a holy war or an attempt at colonization. There was an article in the Sunday Times about how to deal with anger now that the election is over. Frankly, I don’t want to deal with my anger. I want to let it boil until the next election and maybe then people will be sufficiently enraged to actually vote RIGHT this time. Over dinner on Saturday, Adam told me that (having just spent some time in one of those “flyover states”) the mood in the middle of the country is that they hate the coasts, they hate feeling talked down to by the coastal folks who control the media, and they didn’t vote for Kerry because his PR wasn’t as good and he didn’t address their needs like George Bush. Well, be that as it may, I don’t fucking care. If you continue to vote for people like George Bush, you will get continually talked down to by people who know you made the wrong decision. And, if saying that makes me some grand big city snob, so be it. I think California—formerly my most hated state—has been replaced by Ohio. Or Florida. Forget it. I can’t even talk about it anymore.

I don’t even remember what it was that I wrote about Halloween. (Is it possible that it was just last week? Because I’m already ensconced in the season of freakin’ Christmas commercials!) Needless to say it is basically my favorite holiday—c’mon people, I was a drama major!

And, since Friday was both the birthday of Ryan Adams and Graham Parsons, I made a list of the 20 Ryan Adams songs that you should buy/download/listen to right now. I know a lot of you really dislike him (and based on his attitude, the frequency with which he shows up in NME dissing other rockers, or his most recent album that is totally understandable), but I wanted to give you a starter kit or a primer to getting into him. Because it is totally worth it once you give in. I can’t remember all of the songs I picked or what it was that I wrote about them but here is an abbreviated list (even though his 30th birthday has now come and gone): Anything off of “Heartbreaker” is pretty great. Especially “My Sweet Caroline” because of the beautiful harmony lines he sings with Emmylou Harris, and “Come Pick Me Up” because it has some of the best breakup lyrics of a song ever. (Like, “Steal my records, screw all my friends, behind my back. Put a smile on my face and then do it again.”) “Gold” is also a good album but the best songs are usually about Winona Ryder (“Nobody Girl” and “Rescue Blue” come to mind immediately). Also, check out “La Cienega Just Smiled” and “Answering Bell.” (Don’t mind the shitty Adam Duritz harmonies. It is a great song and perhaps my favorite song that uses a banjo.) Off his most recent album, “Rock N Roll,” there is only one good song: “So Alive.” It is like his homage to Replacements’ guitar lines and Morrissey’s falsetto singing, so it sounds like a perfect amalgam of, like, 1986. And finally, his cover of “Wonderwall” is amazing. Oasis never made it sound quite so sad or fraught with pathos. In fact, I read somewhere that Noel or Liam (I always confuse them. One has the eyebrow and the other the big, fat, fucking mouth, right?) said that Ryan’s was the definitive version of the song. That’s got to be a major compliment. Especially coming from the boys in THAT band who think that (though they’ve stolen almost every melody they’ve “written” from one or more of the Beatles) they are God’s gift to he craft of music.

And that was basically it for my previously deleted post. I can’t believe I’ve even bothered to rewrite it. Goddamn it, Time Warner Cable! Will you just come and reconnect us to the Internet?! I can’t believe how impotent I feel without it.

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